I think, all told, the work went very well. We found an out-of-the-way place just off the path by the creek (not Piper's Creek, but another, smaller one that runs through the northern end of the park) and settled ourselves beneath what was likely a douglas fir (though it was hard to tell in the dim twilight).
I won't share the details of the ritual itself, since they are private and specific, but the general format was pretty straightforward: declaring peace to the four directions, grounding in the three realms, weaving a nemeton of the three elements, inviting the guardians of the directions to join us and strengthen our work... "lighting" the central candle to mark the center and open the gateway (since we were in a city park where fires are not permitted, plus nestled in amongst dry branches and leaves, we used an LED candle). For the first time, I formally invited Her to attend and aid us; it seemed appropriate, since she is a Protector of Children (and young women in particular), as well as a fierce guardian of the borders. Her energy seemed ideal for a work of magic meant to strengthen and guard healthy boundaries that have been repeatedly violated and transgressed. I poured an offering of white wine to her in thanks. (Note to self: the smell of alcohol permeated the circle for the rest of the work, since we weren't burning any candles or incense that might have helped to dissipate it, and since alcohol is also not permitted in city parks technically, it made me a bit paranoid, but we had no disruptions, and we were out late enough and in a secluded part of the park so that not once did we even have a curious dog-walker pass — so, no harm no foul.)
After this opening and building of energy and allies, we settled down to the main work, which consisted of some good old reliable sympathetic magic, drawing a protective circle around the gathered locks of hair from the kids that Jeff got from them before he dropped them off at their mom's, as well as locks from both Jeff and myself. We used stones, salt, blessed water, herbs for strength and flower petals to draw the circle, which shone dimly in the twilight against the dark earth. With each drawing of the circle, we asked for a blessing of protection for our family. Then, we drew a triangle of salt outside the circle and placed a symbol of E into it (a piece of weaving she'd done years ago — Jeff threw the rest of it out before we began the ritual). We named the triangle as a space of protection and binding, so that we could address our grievances to her in safety. After we each spoke, we declared that she could not exert her will over us or harm us through will, word or deed, that we would no longer allow her to create unnecessary strife in our lives and that she was bound against harming the children, taking out her issues and insecurities on them or burdening them with guilt or shame. We then affirmed that her love and care for the children as their mother was welcome and that we had no wish to interfere, as long as her relationship with them strengthened and supported them on their path. We surrounded both the protective circle and the binding triangle with a ring of flower petals, invoking the love that weaves together the universe and binds us all to one another as equals through respect and good intention.
After this, I did some simple knot magic, taking a cord of twine for each of the kids and tying four knots in each symbolizing the various blessings we'd drawn around them in the circle. Later today, I'll find little trinkets for each of them to tie up the ends, and complete the charms so that we can send them to the kids.
After all this was done, we then buried the piece of E's weaving and dispersed the triangle. We closed the ritual with a prayer for peace, thanked the goddess who'd attended, thanked and bid farewell to the guardians of the directions, extinguished the candle (ie turned it off — yay LED!) and un-wove the circle of the three elements, allowing any remaining energy to bless the place of our working.
Since my leg was massively asleep by the time we'd finished because of the way I'd been sitting, we sat a little while afterwards in silence, enjoying the night, and then spoke a little about how the ritual had gone. We'd tried a different approach this time, since Jeff does not have much experience with ritual and I'm finding that the physical act of ritual are far more effective for me than sitting still and trying to visualize — my energy work is much more of a visceral, kinesthetic thing than a visual thing. So after I did the opening prayers and invocations from memory, I had Jeff read the prayers from our cheat-sheet (ie iPhone, the newbie ritualist's best friend) as I performed the various actions. This seemed to work out really well for both of us. I didn't have to worry about memorizing words or stumbling over prayers as I worked, so I could concentrate on directing my energy into the physical actions; and Jeff said afterwards that, with his Zen background, he's not big into the ritual itself, but as a linguist and writer he finds words themselves incredibly powerful, and bringing voice to the words and feeling them embodied and manifest through his own body and breath, as a deeply powerful experience that let him feel involved in a way that simply listening to a recitation usually doesn't. He said he could feel the protective strength of the earth beneath us, and I think doing the Three Realms working and grounding at the beginning of the ritual (as well as the few moments of centering and silence we took before starting the work) was incredibly helpful in that respect.
In general, I'm feeling refreshed and very glad to have the thing over and done with. I feel like this was exactly the right time for such work, and the way is clearer and more open now in a way that it wasn't before. I feel incredibly grateful for the work and the energy.
Highlights from the Ritual
"Okay.... seriously, I know his hair is in here somewhere."
"It's holy water, of course it smells minty fresh."
"Deep in the still center of my being, may I find peace—"noise of massive jet flying overhead ".....I said, deep in the still center of my being..."
"Wait, I lost my sandal. Where'd it go? Use your iPhone, can you see it? It's in the bush there somewhere. I knew I should have gone barefoot..."