Daily Diary

Sun: aquarius (air/fixed), 7:33am - 5:33pm
Moon: waning crescent, sagittarius (fire/mutable)
Earth: snow. for the past three days, steady snow layering in slush and ice (hovering in the low 30s), punctuated by moments of sunshine through the clouds

Thoughts: thinking some more about a plan for the next several years in terms of building a career; had a conversation with Jeff over lunch about increasing my skill set for the contractor work I'm doing, including taking an online course in transcription and possibly some tutorials in one or more computer scripts; also, thinking about the revamped website and what I would include, how I would organize it and what its purpose would be (to showcase my writing and my author "persona" while distancing myself from the "passive-ist" stigma that's cropped up due to my writing on P+P, also to expand my audience beyond "Pagans" to include broader interest in earth- and nature-spiritualities)

Actions: slow morning getting going again (after two days off to focus on wedding stuff and website/writing stuff), spent some time singing and crying over Egypt and political angst; brainstorming ideas for new website; late lunch with Jeff, then several hours of contractor work; took a half-hour break to take a walk through the woods in late afternoon; after dinner, sat down to revise the LotS Imbolc ritual to post to the forum

Connections: feeling really good about the work I did for LotS once again; it seems silly to worry so much about internet/FB stuff when the work I do with this group always feels so focused and satisfying (and free of the stigma that I am inherently unreasonable/extreme because I'm a pacifist); I do very much enjoy writing ritual and working through meditations with this group; also, it brings me closer to my goddess, for which I am incredibly grateful; also dealing with some of the old sorrow over politics after reading a depressing article this morning about the news of protests in Egypt and VP Biden's reaction to it (basically that freedom and democracy serve economic interests, not the other way around, and should only be granted if they don't threaten the regime stability of our allies); Ani's "Next Bold Move" got me through that one with only a few tears, but afterward, it felt good to allow sorrow to be sorrow, and not try to justify it or reason it away through bickering

Daily Tarot Card: The Ace of Cups signifies the gifts offered by the mysterious depths of emotion and intuition, and the reflective perceptions and perspective to be gained from engaging deeply and authentically in our nonrational selves, exploring our dreams and creative longings. It is a card of gladness and blessings, signifying emotional fulfillment and enjoyment not from any concrete gain but from feeling ourselves more in tune with the rhythms and currents of life.

What two gifts does the Ace of Cups offer to me now? To the left: The Tower (XVI) signifies a sudden and shaking confrontation with truth and reality in all its complexity and unpredictability. A sharp change in perspective that may bring dreams or plans crashing down, the gift of the Tower offered by the Ace of Cups might be a deeper exploration of the shadow self, the nonrational and irrational aspects that have been hushed up and shuffled aside for the sake of "more important" plans, and now reassert themselves with a vengeance, demanding attention and reconciliation. This is a card of consequences and deeper integration in the face of difficulty and sometimes tragedy. Perhaps as a gift of the Ace of Cups, the sorrow or grief of the Tower is itself a gift, a flowing-over of emotion into expression, helping to cleanse and find renewal.

To the right: the Six of Pentacles, a card of mutual support and generosity, spiraling through a cycle of self-sustaining life and giving. Success has led to prosperity that is now poured out for others in need, watering the thirsty ground so that others may drink and grow, and in turn offer their support and generosity to others. This card is one that indicates the wise and compassionate sharing of resources and gifts with others, not merely as a superior benefactor to the lowly and needy, but as one who is in the midst of cultivating those gifts with the support and encouragement of others around us. As a gift of the Ace of Cups, we experience the emotional and spiritual fulfillment in witnessing in a very visceral, manifest way the ways in which we are all connected in a cycle of generosity, prosperity and charity to others. Unlike the Tower, which may have consolidated resources to build higher and higher towards a particular purpose, the Six of Pentacles seems to celebrate the sharing and gift-giving as a distribution and diffusion of resources among all so that all may benefit. The cycle of giving and support may even be more important than the specifics of the gifts themselves in some ways. This, again, reflects the themes of gladness and connection in the Ace of Cups, as well as reflecting that aspect of dreams and ideals that can guide us even when they seem impractical. The Six of Pentacles shows us that such generosity is the height of practicality, when gifts are giving gladly and joyfully to others as an expression of our relationship and connection.